February 11, 2009

Every drop

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Thoughts come to me.

They pop into my head throughout the day. Sometimes I look off into space and think about how I could write it.

Like clay, I work and re-work the sentences, phrases and words in my head. I stretch them and add substance and prose and take away the bits that don't fit.

Often, I'm not in a place where I can do anything to record these thoughts. At a playgroup with Sam. Playing with him, or riding in the car with him.

I start to feel excited, and I can't wait for that time after Sam goes to bed when I can sit down with the laptop and just WRITE. I feel so full of ideas and the promise of these amazing posts fuels me.

But the day goes on. And on.

I get tired. I start to get irritable. Sam is climbing on me again, and all I want is some space of my own.

By the time he's in bed, I sit down at the computer.

And stare at a blank screen.

And wish that I could remember every single brilliant thought, every drop of passion, every tear in my eye and sigh in my lungs.

And for another night, it just escapes me.

4 comments :

maggie's mind said...

Oh, amen. Yep, this is so true for so many, I think. I try to just jot stuff down to remember to remember, but I get what you mean about constructing the sentence in you mind just perfectly but then gone if you don't get a chance to save it somewhere.

Keeper of the Skies Wife said...

I'm the same way!!!

Rachael said...

it may not be what you intended to say for the day, but this post is beautifully written. i do the same exact thing, day after day.

Mom said...

You should get one of those little tape recorders and carry it around with you. You could transcribe later.

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