October 13, 2005

Okay, Enough is Enough

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Yuuuuuuuuck! I stayed home from work again today. I feel like I've been missing a lot of work, but really I've only missed 3 days the whole time I've been pregnant. I've been late a bunch of times, but I've made up all of those hours. It's been easier to make time up since I stopped taking lunches. Since I can't really eat, there's no point in taking a long break when I have things to do. This morning I couldn't even sit up without feeling like I was going to hurl. How am I supposed to get ready & go to work when I can't even sit up!?

Sigh... I'm trying to make sure I'm eating enough, keeping something in my stomach, but it's so hard when my choices are so limited. I mean, at this point it's pretty much cheerios, crackers and bagels or english muffins. Sometimes I can handle macaroni & cheese or ramen noodles. Anytime I eat anything with more (cheese, meat, most sauce), I just feel terrible afterwards. The last couple days I made orange juice slushees (just ice, OJ and a litlte bit of frozen OJ blended up). Drinking something cold like that seems to help, and it's at least some nutrition.

It's just so frustrating for me because I don't want people to think they can't count on me, but there is literally nothing I can do about it! Normally when you're sick there are at least a few things that you can do to make yourself better, but I don't really have any control here. I'm going to feel lousy until the little bean lets me feel better! Every day that goes by I hope that I'm getting toward the end of this. I'm 11w2d today, so I'll be 12 weeks next Tuesday and at the end of my first trimester. I am looking forward to the second - people saying they get their energy back and feel better gives me hope at least. Although, Laurie told me at work that when she told Terry why I was sick, Terry said that it should go away by the 14th or 15th week. Too long!!! At least she understood, she also said that morning sickness is not like anything else and you can't really understand it unless you've been there yourself. Anyhow, everybody send me 'feel better' vibes, okay? By the time this is over I'll probably be so sick of bread I'll convert to the Atkins diet. Okay.... that would never happen, but you know what I mean!

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